THE JOYS OF INTERNET ‘SHOPPING’

Or everyday life made extremely unpleasant and stress inducing by complete idiots

I just thought I would share this little gem with you all.

It neatly describes everyone’s typical experiences of the arrogant, offhand manner of modern retailing and using the internet in particular to buy things.

Dear Sir or Madam,

I was  trying to buy some school uniform clothing from your  internet based business.

After spending about forty minutes being forced to ramble painfully  and fruitlessly around your intensely badly designed web site looking for the most basic information, I made a telephone call to you make the very simplest of enquiries as your website was so bad it was unable to be of any use to me.

This only made matters worse as firstly, I had to wait a long time while being constantly informed how important my call was and so I must wait to speak to someone, and secondly it was clear that I was only going to be able to speak to a ‘brain dead’ call centre operative who would be unable to communicate sensibly about anything, instead of a proper retailing member of your company who would actually know the basics about what your business does and how to deal with your customers’ ordinary everyday requirements.

Nevertheless, I bit my lip and suppressed the annoyance at a business that had this kind of breath-taking arrogance towards its potential customers of employing useless ‘call centres’ instead of bothering to deal directly with it’s own customers.

Unfortunately, I was proved absolutely right, as when the operator in ‘customer services’ answered, she was nasty sounding right from the off, arrogant, aggressive, and completely offhand and not only entirely uninterested in dealing with my very simple query, but was clearly unable to as she obviously knew absolutely nothing about what kind of service  a retailer is expected to provide to a customer. 

So, even if she had been a decent, civilised  and polite person who was actually trying to be helpful, instead of exactly the opposite, she would not have been able to do what any normal retailer should be able to do in terms of helping a customer purchase the products needed. She was simply a disinterested ‘call centre time waster’ who  knew very little about anything at all, had nothing but sawdust and cotton wool inside her head instead of a brain, and couldn’t care less about anything except vacuously polishing her fingernails as an alternative to actually thinking while she was speaking to one of your customers on the telephone.

But actually she was an unpleasant, ignorant  rude specimen of humanity that any sensible person would consider  a positive danger for a business of any kind to employ. And as this useless person was an employee of a ‘call centre’ instead of what should have been a knowledgeable person directly employed by your own  school uniform clothing supply company, she had absolutely no interest in helping one of your customers buy any of your products. Instead she lost you business.

This ghastly juvenile young harpy started aggressively lecturing me as though I was an errant child for asking the simple and ordinary questions that I did, and promptly put the phone down as her crowning achievement in how to annoy customers and lose you business.

I am not going to spend the next several years being forced to buy my son’s school uniform from your unpleasant company without doing something about it. Instead, I will make every effort to convince not only this school, but all the others, that they would be far better off dealing with a decent retailer instead of such a rude, arrogant and downright nasty, grasping, overpriced  bunch of twits like you obviously appear to be.

Frankly, the sooner you go bust the better it will be for all the schools you currently service. Employing incompetent, disinterested call centres who know nothing about retailing, instead of doing your job and actually supplying a proper retailing service (which is what you are supposed to be in business for ! ) , thus annoying and misleading your customers in the most irritating of ways, is a pretty good way to lose all your custom to another  business that operates in a more civilised manner.

Yours Sincerely,

Boz

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