VERY BIG TERROR PLOT NOT VERY BIG OR TERRIFYING OR A PLOT, ADMIT POLICE


mashlogo4


THE very big terror plot uncovered by police last week is not big, does not involve terrorists and is not a plot of any kind, it it has emerged.


Quick resigned after jeopardising an operation that turned out to be a waste of time anyway. Brilliant.

As nine brown men were deported for having beards, the police blamed the Home Office, the Home Office blamed MI5 and MI5 warned everyone it could kill them with its thumb.



An inquiry will now be launched into why the prime minister was allowed to scare the shit out of everyone, though experts insist it may just have had something to do with the news agenda.



A police spokesman said: “We were hoping to charge them with conspiracy to go to the shops to buy crisps and Tizer, but according to our lawyers that that’s not an actual offence, as yet.



”We have therefore taken the precautionary step of sending these men and their potentially explosive beards back from whence they came.”



He added: “Come to think of it, Bob Quick must be absolutely f*****g livid. Whadya reckon?”



A spokesman for home secretary Jacqui Smith said: “Embarrassed? No, we’re way, way beyond embarrassment at this stage.

”That’s a bit like asking a streaker if he’s embarrassed because he hasn’t shaved.”

Tags:

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 48 other followers

%d bloggers like this: